What Am I Doing with This Man?

Victoria Allen signed up for a past life reading with me, and one of her questions for me was why she often looked at her husband, whom she loved, and wondered what they were doing together. She was not entirely sure this was the man she was supposed to be with even though it was a good marriage, and wondered if there were a past life that would explain this feeling. Here is the first lifetime I saw for her. After the reading is her feedback.

In the first past life I am seeing you are in a culture where marriages are arranged by the couples’ families consulting with astrologers. Marriages have happened like this in many civilizations, and is probably not a bad idea actually, considering how many marriages fail these days. You were in a situation where you had very little choice in the matter of who you married, and this was difficult because you were not in a culture which allowed women to protest this kind of thing. Yet you decided you absolutely did not want to marry the man who had been picked out for you without actually knowing him. Being introduced formally, you saw him face to face, and thought he was quite ugly. As you were a very beautiful woman, you thought that you would like them to try again, please. You did not know how you could possibly come to love such an ugly man. In other words, you did not know how you could ever make love to a man who looked like that. You did not quite have the concept of romantic love, that was not part of your culture. But you did think there should be some kind of immediate attraction. In most cultures, romantic love was known to be a thing that was short-lived, and that if you wished to be happy, you would not marry for that alone. Romantic love was something children played around with, but adults did not make life-long decisions based on something so transitory.

Feeling certain that you could not have a happy marriage you decided to refuse him. Yet he really was the best choice for you astrologically, and you would have got past the way he looked quickly. What you did not realize, because you were a virgin, was that the way he smelled, how his skin felt, and simple sexual chemistry mattered more than his looks. You would truly have been compatible in that way. It was such a missed opportunity!

Your Souls decided to reincarnate this time to be together, because you were supposed to be last time, only this time you are not quite as compatible. Marrying him was something that you had agreed to do in that lifetime, before you ever incarnated. Because you did not, you came back to do it in this lifetime, to balance the karma of not having kept your agreement to marry him previously. And this time you came to actually be in love with him, more in the way you thought you should be in that prior life. Yet there are things missing that you would have had in that prior one. And you will just have to decide if this is someone you want to stay with, or if you feel that the karma is fulfilled, and if not you may feel later that it is. You will know.

So that is what you are doing with this man in this lifetime, and why you sometimes wonder if you belong with him. That is a feeling that is carrying over from the prior life – that you do not belong together. It may very well be that once you hear this, you will no longer have doubts. Hearing about it may just heal you so that the feeling does not carry over any more. Hearing about a past life often heals unexpected things in odd ways. And then you feel like, oh, yeah. I am supposed to be with this guy. Because this time I want to be.

Victoria's Feedback on the Reading:

Sorry I did not give feedback earlier, I tend to be bad at giving feedback.  I thought you would like to know that I actually saw the vision at the same time you were remotely connecting to me.  I didn't hear the narration, I just saw the image. Also, I did not see all the lives, just the first one that meant the most to me.  At around 4 am in the morning I found myself coming out of deep sleep and felt my eyes flutter uncontrollably and head feel pressurized as I saw an image with vibrant emerald green colors and a beautiful young Asian female being walked into a room with two people on either side of her, as if she was being revealed for the first time after coming of age.  

She did not appear happy as if she was forced to be there.  The image was brief because I got so excited knowing you must have been doing my reading.  As my conscious mind took over I found that the image faded and was gone.  As I went through my day I told myself that maybe it was a vivid dream, but by 2 pm that same day you emailed me my reading I knew my vision was not a dream.  As I listened to your reading I did not see the image but did feel the same uncontrollable flutter with my eyes as I listened to your reading.  I felt tears flow down my face and my heart feel broken during the first reading.  

Apparently, in that life, I rejected an arranged marriage with my current husband in this life.  However, in this life, I love my husband very much and he loves me but sometimes in the beginning or every now and then I get feelings asking why we are together.  We don't argue much and get along well and have 2 beautiful girls.  I know I am with the man I was meant to be with but never understood why those feelings popped up.  After listening to your reading I now understand why I questioned us in the beginning and on occasion.  He is so loving and caring and has such a big heart; I'm glad I chose to come into this life to experience love with him.  Even there were times I had questions, I always had a greater feeling that I was always with the man I was meant to marry.  I had come across your audiobook over the Christmas holiday and wondered whether you could answer my question and I'm very glad and thankful to you.  I guess I should have emailed you earlier but I tend to be bad with feedback.

On a side note, I had been able to use a popular self-regression method involving a prayer on myself before, but whenever I asked this question my guides always told me I was not ready to know.  Maybe because I would not have believed it if they told me that I rejected him in that life.  It's funny how our guides will only let you know what they feel you are ready to know or is important for you to know.

As for the other readings, I'm currently at a crossroads on what I want to do with my career.  The overwhelming message is I need to do it and am strong enough to do it.  It's like the extra nudge I need to light the fire in me. 

Again thank you and many blessings,

Victoria